13 March 2006
Memo to Self: Move to Texas; Sign Kinky's Petition
DALLAS - An independent candidate for Texas governor rode in a St. Patrick's Day parade car Saturday with his trademark black hat and burning cigar — plus a beer in his hand, an apparent violation of the state's open container law.One has to wonder whether it was the Democratic Party operative or the Republican Party operative who made sure that their contact at the Dallas Morning News got the Earth-shattering story. Probably both.
Kinky Friedman's spokeswoman acknowledged that he drank from a can of Guinness handed to him. Photographs taken by The Dallas Morning News showed Friedman, who wasn't driving, holding the beer and appearing to take a drink.
State law prohibits opened alcoholic beverages in the passenger area of a motor vehicle. The Class C misdemeanor carries a maximum fine of $500.
Dallas police didn't cite Friedman, and Lt. Rick Watson said Friedman can't be ticketed after the fact because it wasn't witnessed by an officer.
"Guinness is the drink that kept the Irish from taking over the world. It would be unthinkable not to have a Guinness during a St. Patrick's Day parade. In fact, it would be spiritually wrong," Friedman said in a statement issued by spokeswoman Laura Stromberg.
Friedman was serving as grand marshal in the parade while volunteer supporters helped gather signatures to get him on the November ballot. He needs 45,540 signatures by May 11 from registered voters who skipped the primaries.
Feh. Expect this one to show up again, next time with the revised headline, "Jew boy insults Irish."